im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
