i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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