i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
