omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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