I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Randomize
