you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
She even gives head with a lisp.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Someone came in the potted fern
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Randomize
