my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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