I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
