mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
