fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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