I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Is Oprah even human
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
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