Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
its liver damage thursday
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
