I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
