so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I am mentally ready for anal.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
