ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize