Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize