There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
