Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize