i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
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