You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Randomize
