she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
organizing the empties. That sober.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
