just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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