Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
