sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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