Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
well I can't set my house on fire every night
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
