bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i dont even know how to be here
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
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