See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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