Buhtt sex?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
All the doctor said was why
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
