if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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