It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
