Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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