I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
