things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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