My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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