It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize