She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
