I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
