Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
