She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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