Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
YAS. BRING CRAB.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
