just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize