Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
