bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
