have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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