she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize