I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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