Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
