so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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