waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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