after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
