I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
